What a huge 24 hours!

Oh my gosh don't quite know where to start so please forgive my ramblings.

After a massive week at work i felt exhausted yesterday. 30 three and four year olds each day at preschool has just worn me out. So this week has gone very fast for me. I have literally had not much of a life other than work and bed.  So focussing on the fact that my blood test was looming today really only played on my mind when i went to the toilet and checked my nickers.

 Until last night when the cramps in my tummy intensified. I tucked myself up in bed at 8.30 totally exhausted. Until 10.15 when i woke with the urgent need to vomit. Not an easy task because my toilet is outside. So began my night filled with numerous trips to the toilet to vomit.

Here is a question "what is worse than having to run to an outside toilet to vomit"?
a) you don't run fast enough and vomit on your sock and the toilet floor and while you have your head in the toilet the cat is licking up the vomit?
b) your trip over the dog who thinks you running to the toilet at 3 in the morning is a game?
c) your husband who has been out all night fishing is gutting his catch outside the front door at 3.30am when you are on yet another run to the toilet and proceeds to tell you "fish for tea tomorrow"?

The answer ALL OF THE ABOVE

After my bonding with the toilet i then had to drive to work (60kms) till my replacement came in. I then went for my blood test:

BFP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  HCG 258
So what i thought was gastro could now possibly be morning sickness?

I'm so happy that after what was an  awfully long night this day has started off so well, and now i'm going to rub my tummy and catch up on some much needed sleep.

PGD Results

I would have had this posted sooner but after i typed it on my iphone on Wednesday afternoon whilst sitting at the airport my iphone had a little tantrum and the whole post was lost whilst i was trying to post it. After an emotional few days it was almost enough to tip me over the edge completley so i didn't bother retyping it in case the same thing happened again.

So my results were fantastic. All that stressing, freaking out and tears were for nothing because so far (fingers crossed) everything is going to plan. I got to see the PGD scientist first who gave me my results:

2 - affected embryos (these were male because only males get affected)
2 - carrier embryos (these were females because they don't get affected but pass it on - e.g me)
4 - not affected embryos (boys and girls but i didn't ask how many of each)

I'm stoked with that. As you can see though this genetic disease which i am a carrier of is quite strong with half my embryos either affected or carriers.

Next came the embryologist who told me all about my embryos. The one that was going in was a hatching blastocyst and doing absolutley everything they want it to do. According to the emrbryologist is looks perfect! Not sure how i feel about that. Part of me got super excited then the Joanne who has had so many tranfers I'm almost running out of fingers to count them on emerged and i started to panic. Thoughts like "oh god if this embryo is perfect and everything they want it to be and it doesn't stick than what chances do i have of ever falling pregnant." I guess this is the emotional infertile who lacks self confidence in their body doing the most natural thing in the world, that it continues to fail at - coming out.

Anyway my FS gave the embryo a good talking to and told it we have done enough mucking around and now we want a baby. Lightened the mood of him between my legs with a giant needle containing my perfect precious embryo.

So here i am 2 days post transfer and doing everything possible to not obsess about this TWW. My blood test is due next friday the 14th. I will have to wait to the Saturday to do my blood test though as i start my new job on Monday and the pathology lab is an hour and a half from work one way and doesn't open till 7.30am and i start work at 8am.

I am surprisingly calm though. I'm excited to be spending my TWW focussing on my new job instead of obsessing over every niggle and twinge and visiting Dr Google! Af usually arrives before my blood test and i just hope with all my heart that she stays away and this time i get my take home baby.

We made it to biopsy!

Phew! I didn't get the call till 10.30am and was freaking out! But we have 8 little day 6 embryos that the clinic were able to biopsy.

Another hurdle passed - now hopefully we will have a healthy one to transfer.

Day 3 Results are in!

It was 10.30 am and I still hadn't got my results so I rang the clinic. I hate this wait I find it way worse than the actual TWW itself. The nurse told me they were very busy in the lab today and not to panic they just hadnt checked them yet.

Anyway the nurse just rang and it's great news. At day 3 they like the embryos to be 6 cells or above. I have 1 slow embryo at 5 cells and the other 14 are 6 cells or above!!!! There is even a 10 cell one in there which could be developing too fast. So that leaves 12 in the normal range. WOOHOO!!!!

So I feel better by the looks of things I will have plenty of little embryos for testing, which is a good thing as usually half or more of my embryos are affected. These are the best results I've ever had so I'm stoked.

I have a good feeling about this cycle- everything is just falling into place.

Fertilization results

Everything is going brilliantly so far. All 18 eggs were mature enough for ICSI to be performed and out of those 18 there was 15 that fertilized. The nurse said I am incredibly lucky and I certainly feel it! Bring on Sunday's day 3 results.

A good haul

Epu today. All went well 18 eggies collected altogether. Procedure was a bit painful
But manageable.

This is posted from my iPhone so please forgive my lack of details

Its Time!!!!

I had another ultrasound and blood test this morning and this afternoon recieved the exciting news that egg pick up will be Thursday morning sometime!

 This morning i was super calm at my ultrasound compared to normal, in fact so calm i never asked how big the biggest follie was or even how many there were. In my previous post i mentioned i had 20 follicles on each side. Instead i lay there completley calm and dare i say it relaxed,  for someone who had a probe shoved up their veejeejay.  That was until the radiographer started counting the follicles on my right ovary, she got to 29 -  29 FREAKING FOLLICLES!

I froze. I freaked. I said nothing.

I have no idea how many were on the other ovary i never asked and she never counted out loud.

You see i have overstimulated on my very first ICSI cycle way back in 2008. Despite having PCOS and getting 18 eggs at epu my dr never touched on the fact i could get OHSS and so it was only when i couldn't walk and felt like i had water sloshing around inside me that i demanded a BT and was found to be severley overstimulated and put on immediate bed rest.

I'm going to trust in the process though. I have done so many cycles and things finally look like they could be looking up for me. I have had my endometriosis removed and we have recieved this amazing grant where our cycle is fully funded. 

This cycle I will get lots of good qualitiy eggs that will fertilise. I will get the PGD testing done and i will have unaffected embryos to transfer and i will get my miracle baby.

Fingers crossed anyway!